Stream of Consciousness Sunday–What, Me Worry?

As some of you may know, i love a good meme.  Especially when it breaks me out of “but i don’t have anything to write about today” blues.  I noticed yesterday that i get ALOT of hits when i actually DO write a post, so i know i need to write more… So here goes:

#SOCsundayLately i’ve been struggling with fears–completely irrational, unfounded fears that just permeate the deepest quietest parts of me–those places i reserve for a moment of peace from my crazy brain.  Guess its been working in overdrive and started to fill in some of those empty places (please keep all cracks about empty brains to yourself please)

At the top of those worries is that my Old Man will leave me for someone who has a typical kid.  WHich is ridiculous on multiple levels.  BUt there it is.

I should state here that this fear of being left is deep.  Never knew my Dad, got cheated on by college boyfriend, you get the picture.  I work on this DAILY, but it doesn’t change the irrationality of it.  SOmetimes i just worry.

Which supposedly fits into my chinese horoscope–i was born year of the dog.  And we worry.  when i read that i threw the book away.  jerks.  WHat do they know about anxiety?  jerkheads.

I’m also a scorpio–which should cancel all that out yeah?  i mean, scorps are all serious and mystical–why would they worry?  Unless their chart is almost identical to CHarles Manson (me) and they worry that they will  end up convincing a bunch of people to do fucked up shit.

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wow–that was 5 minutes?  yikes.  This is my brain.  good times.

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Categories: Uncategorized | 8 Comments

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8 thoughts on “Stream of Consciousness Sunday–What, Me Worry?

  1. I hear ya. Lately my anxiety levels feel like they are going to crack my spine. And last night I dreamt that my in-laws discovered that I really am a crazy person and they turned on me. ::sigh:: good times indeed…

  2. Anxious is my middle name! I hope things get better for you!

  3. Fellow Scorpio here who gets hit with anxiety like a beast now and then. I totally get you. But yes, definitely DO write, I think it helps with the anxiety to share it, etc. and overall just works, ya know? Does that even make sense – I’m not sure – but I hope so. :) Stay strong and you do you and it’ll all fall into place – but let yourself be supported by putting yourself out there.

  4. Mom

    Love you

  5. You don’t even want to get me started on fears and anxiety! I am about to leave my husband who is a diabetic and on dialysis home alone for a week while our kids and I go off on vacation. I am FORCING myself to do this, for all of us, for many reasons. So yeah, I feel you.

    Came over from Fadra’s. NIce to meet you!

  6. Anxiety has been trying to rule my life lately. I totally get it. I loved reading your SOC today. It helps to know I’m not the only one with wild thoughts going through my head, and it’s ok. We are who we are and we will persevere.

  7. Oh anxiety, she just insists on being my best friend lately, as in the last twenty plus years. Hugs to you. And thanks for the giggle “this is my brain. good times.”

  8. Anxiety is my constant companion since I have an anxiety disorder, and I totally get that fear of being left thing. I hope you find a way to work through it all!

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